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Just Posted
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Do you mean condensation?

Posted by: aypapi | Category: Age 9

While at a fast food restaurant, I used a napkin that had been on my drink, to wipe my 11-year old son's mouth. He said, Eww, it's wet!" My nine-year old said, "Don't worry, it's just constipation!"...

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Ummm….

Posted by: mommyof3 | Category: Unknown Age

"Run! The cops!"...

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Easter Bunny

Posted by: mommyof3 | Category: Unknown Age

easter eggs come from the easter bunnies butt...

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Trash

Posted by: mommyof3 | Category: Unknown Age

while holding my hand juni said "gotta take out the trash." and asked her about the trash, and she said it was me!...

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Tooshie

Posted by: mommyof3 | Category: Unknown Age

"is my butt funny when it wiggles?"...

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Then Stop

Posted by: Geeore | Category: Age 4

Gabriella: My hand tastes like mud. Blech! Daddy: Then stop licking it....

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Unholy Moly

Posted by: ConnorsDad | Category: Age 5

At bedtime my 5 year old boy asks "Daddy, does the Devil look like a mole?" My answer, after moles have lived in our backyard for several years, was a resounding "YES!"...

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Broken dogs?

Posted by: Rob M. | Category: Age 5

As we were leaving to go shopping one day, we saw a male Labrador Retriever in our front yard. My said, "What a pretty Lab." I replied, "Yeah, but he's not fixed.". My five-year-old said from the back...

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What, what, what?

Posted by: Geeore | Category: Age 4

While eating dinner: “Daddy, are we going to play the dreidel game on Kwanzaa?” Seriously, you can’t make this stuff up…...

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Big Buns

Posted by: momuvtwins | Category: Age 4

I patted my four year old twin's bottom and said "Your buns are so little" She patted my buns and said "Momma has BIG buns!" ...

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Pooped!

Posted by: JenniO | Category: Age 3

After chasing our dog around the house for 10 minutes. Bailey, who is 5: I'm Pooped! Alexis, who is 3: I'm Peepeed!...

161346 total views, 48 so far today
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The Birthday Present

Posted by: Steven Yo | Category: Age 5

Dad: "What does Thomas want for his birthday?" Jennifer: "Well, he likes most anything with rainbows on it. And he like tutus."...

161283 total views, 47 so far today
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Mmm. Tree Bark.

Posted by: 247Mom | Category: Age 4

"If mommy spends all of our money, we'll have to live in the street and eat tree bark."...

160916 total views, 47 so far today
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Broken dogs?

Posted by: Rob M. | Category: Age 5

As we were leaving to go shopping one day, we saw a male Labrador Retriever in our front yard. My said, "What a pretty Lab." I replied, "Yeah, but he's not fixed.". My five-year-old said from the back...

160655 total views, 46 so far today
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Tecksticular

Posted by: jokeranker | Category: Age 3, Age 5

3 Year Old Daughter: "Daddy Looks tecksticular!" Me: "Daddy looks TESTICULAR???" 5 Year Old Daughter: "I think she was trying to say spectacular."...

160012 total views, 45 so far today
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I’m Old

Posted by: FritoBandito | Category: Age 5

In the car on the way to get donuts on Sunday morning my 5 year old said to me - If you forgot your iPod, then how are we listening to music right now?...

159761 total views, 45 so far today
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Unholy Moly

Posted by: ConnorsDad | Category: Age 5

At bedtime my 5 year old boy asks "Daddy, does the Devil look like a mole?" My answer, after moles have lived in our backyard for several years, was a resounding "YES!"...

159531 total views, 45 so far today
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Salty

Posted by: Highlands | Category: Age 6

Mommy: "Why do you keep licking me?" My Daughter: "You taste salty."...

159459 total views, 44 so far today
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Big Buns

Posted by: momuvtwins | Category: Age 4

I patted my four year old twin's bottom and said "Your buns are so little" She patted my buns and said "Momma has BIG buns!" ...

159285 total views, 46 so far today
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Then Stop

Posted by: Geeore | Category: Age 4

Gabriella: My hand tastes like mud. Blech! Daddy: Then stop licking it....

158898 total views, 45 so far today
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Ten Randoms
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Mommy Can’t Dance

Posted by: brandilinnperry | Category: Age 3

My three year old son and I were playing with a Dora mermaid doll with a seashell that plays a song when you press it. When the song started playing I began dancing around and told him to dance with m...

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Star Wars

Posted by: TJS | Category: Age 7

Me (in Darth voice): "turn to the dark side and we will rule the galaxy as father and son" My son: "But what about Princess Leia?" Kids should watch Star Wars in the right order: Episodes 4,5,6,1,2,...

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Ummm….

Posted by: mommyof3 | Category: Unknown Age

"Run! The cops!"...

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My 2 year old trying to sing where is th...

Posted by: Jared213 | Category: Age 2

[tube]OC1KjzWKNSQ[/tube] Comes out sounding not quite right, but pretty funny. ...

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Pigs Are Pink

Posted by: FritoBandito | Category: Age 6

"Why are you coloring your pig black?  ALL pigs are pink!  Even boy pigs."...

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Mashed Potatoes

Posted by: Geeore | Category: Age 6

"Mama, are mashed potatoes actually just really, really mashed up potatoes?"...

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Midwest Weather Confusion

Posted by: momToAllBoys | Category: Age 2

We just got our first real snow of the winter last night, (January 11th) so my 2 yr old Lucas came running in the kitchen and said: Mommy mommy guess what! ME: What? Lucas: Santa Claus is coming!...

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E.L.L. Spells…

Posted by: footon | Category: Age 4

My 4 Year Old to me: "What does E. L. L. spell?" Me: "nothing" 4 Year Old to 6 Year Old Sister: "I know how to spell 'Nothing'". 6 Year Old: "How?" 4 Year Old: "E. L. L." ...

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I’m Old

Posted by: FritoBandito | Category: Age 5

In the car on the way to get donuts on Sunday morning my 5 year old said to me - If you forgot your iPod, then how are we listening to music right now?...

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Earth shaking screams

Posted by: momToAllBoys | Category: Age 4

My 2 yr old Lucas was doing one of his "terrible twos" gut wrenching screams, and his brother, our 4 yr old son Jack said to him: "Lukey quit youre going to broke the whole house down, then we not goi...

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Having kids is one of the most awesome experiences in life. Some of the things they say will either having you rolling on the floor, blushing with embarrassment, or biting your tongue. This is the place to share your stories or quotes.

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