Color the WHOLE world
Posted by: sarahkhill0703 | Category: Age 3
It was a typical bedtime routine night. Bath, jammies, and teeth brushing. My son Caleb asked me if he could go downstairs to get his favorite blanket. "Sure" I said and continued to turn down the hou...
Obama at Walmart
Posted by: jullyd | Category: Age 2
My 2 year old was standing next to daddy who was watching a news report on TV. My husband pointed to the screen and said: "Look Julian, that's Obama, the US president. A few days later while shopping ...
My 2 year old trying to sing where is th...
Posted by: Jared213 | Category: Age 2
[tube]OC1KjzWKNSQ[/tube] Comes out sounding not quite right, but pretty funny. ...
Wear your helmet
Posted by: autumnleaf72 | Category: Age 4
My 4-year-old daughter Allie asked if she could go outside and ride her bicycle. I said, "Remember to wear your helmet." Allie looked at me seriously and ernestly and replied, "It sometimes works with...
Just turned 2
Posted by: scrosby | Category: Age 2
My son just turned two last month and over the last few days has really started to voice his opinion about things. Last night I told him it was time to eat dinner. His response was I don't want to hav...
Mean Nana
Posted by: brandilinnperry | Category: Age 5
About a week ago I was babysitting my friend's five year old daughter. Her older brother was getting ready to go spend the night at his grandma's and later on she was going to be spending the night at...
Mommy Can’t Dance
Posted by: brandilinnperry | Category: Age 3
My three year old son and I were playing with a Dora mermaid doll with a seashell that plays a song when you press it. When the song started playing I began dancing around and told him to dance with m...
Funny Necks
Posted by: anjipie | Category: Age 5
"mom, you always play with me when there are no kids at the park" yes, I do. "so you will if no one is there this time?" of course "Cause your not old" Well I am not THAT old! "yeah, cause old p...
Sleeping Booger
Posted by: abraswell | Category: Age 2
I was making dinner one night and i saw that my daughter ava had a booger in her nose so i went to get a tissue and when i came back to get her to blow her nose she said "shhhhh mommy she's sleeping" ...
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The Birthday Present
Posted by: Steven Yo | Category: Age 5
Dad: "What does Thomas want for his birthday?" Jennifer: "Well, he likes most anything with rainbows on it. And he like tutus."...
Mmm. Tree Bark.
Posted by: 247Mom | Category: Age 4
"If mommy spends all of our money, we'll have to live in the street and eat tree bark."...
Broken dogs?
Posted by: Rob M. | Category: Age 5
As we were leaving to go shopping one day, we saw a male Labrador Retriever in our front yard. My said, "What a pretty Lab." I replied, "Yeah, but he's not fixed.". My five-year-old said from the back...
Tecksticular
Posted by: jokeranker | Category: Age 3, Age 5
3 Year Old Daughter: "Daddy Looks tecksticular!" Me: "Daddy looks TESTICULAR???" 5 Year Old Daughter: "I think she was trying to say spectacular."...
I’m Old
Posted by: FritoBandito | Category: Age 5
In the car on the way to get donuts on Sunday morning my 5 year old said to me - If you forgot your iPod, then how are we listening to music right now?...
Unholy Moly
Posted by: ConnorsDad | Category: Age 5
At bedtime my 5 year old boy asks "Daddy, does the Devil look like a mole?" My answer, after moles have lived in our backyard for several years, was a resounding "YES!"...
Big Buns
Posted by: momuvtwins | Category: Age 4
I patted my four year old twin's bottom and said "Your buns are so little" She patted my buns and said "Momma has BIG buns!" ...
Cars are built for..
Posted by: momToAllBoys | Category: Age 4
My 4 yr old son Jack asked me if he could take his new remote control car outside to drive it so he doesnt crash it into the wall, I said no its wet and rainy. Then he said, "cars can drive in the rai...
What, what, what?
Posted by: Geeore | Category: Age 4
While eating dinner: “Daddy, are we going to play the dreidel game on Kwanzaa?” Seriously, you can’t make this stuff up…...
Easter Bunny
Posted by: mommyof3 | Category: Unknown Age
easter eggs come from the easter bunnies butt...
Earth shaking screams
Posted by: momToAllBoys | Category: Age 4
My 2 yr old Lucas was doing one of his "terrible twos" gut wrenching screams, and his brother, our 4 yr old son Jack said to him: "Lukey quit youre going to broke the whole house down, then we not goi...
From Head to Toe
Posted by: bassmasterson | Category: Age 6
I told my six-year-old not to come out of her room until she was dressed from head to toe (meaning she needed to put shoes on). She said, "Does that mean I need to wear some kind of a mask or somethin...
Trash
Posted by: mommyof3 | Category: Unknown Age
while holding my hand juni said "gotta take out the trash." and asked her about the trash, and she said it was me!...
Sneaky Sleeper
Posted by: momToAllBoys | Category: Age 4
I told my 4 yr old son Jackson to get in bed and go to sleep heres how that played out. JACKSON: I dont want to go to sleep, I want to pretend to be asleep. ME: (exhausted) Ok then, goodnight, lov...
Welcome to Funny Things My Kid Said
Read. Write. Share. Laugh.
Having kids is one of the most awesome experiences in life. Some of the things they say will either having you rolling on the floor, blushing with embarrassment, or biting your tongue. This is the place to share your stories or quotes.
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